What do Steps Two and Three of the 12-Step program actually ask of an alcoholic, and how does someone who once put all of their faith in alcohol come to believe in a power greater than themselves? In this episode of RecoverED, Ryan O'Hara walks through Steps Two and Three directly from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.
What You'll Hear
- What Step Two means by "came to believe" and how an alcoholic finds a power greater than themselves
- How to approach a higher power if you struggle with faith or are angry at God
- What "restore us to sanity" means for an alcoholic, even when sober
- What it means to turn your will and your life over to the care of God in Step Three
- Why the Big Book identifies self-will as the root of the alcoholic's troubles
What Does "Came to Believe" Mean in Step Two of AA?
For Ryan, Step Two rests on the truth of Step One. After five and a half years sober, a $75,000 job, and his family back in his life, he decided he could drink on weekends. Within weeks, he stopped going to work. Within years, he had lost his apartment, his relationship, and his place in his children's lives. That experience left no doubt that he was powerless over alcohol, and that certainty made it easier to believe a power outside of himself could do what he could not.
For listeners who struggle with the idea of God, Ryan points to the Big Book's suggestion to choose your own conception of God. The faith he once placed in alcohol to get him to work, to school, and through every day became a willingness to believe. As the Big Book puts it, that willingness is enough to begin.
How Do You Turn Your Will Over to God in Step Three?
Step Three, Ryan explains, is a decision to work the rest of the steps. The Big Book describes the alcoholic as an actor trying to run the whole show, and Ryan recognized himself on that stage, trying to control everyone around him and blaming others when it did not work. The problem was not only alcohol; it was selfishness and self-centeredness.
There was no burning bush moment. Instead, Ryan watched the program work in others until he believed it could work for him. He shares the story of a friend who prayed for God to provide a new job, then turned down the job offer placed directly in front of him before realizing what had happened. Faith without works is dead: the Third Step decision is followed by daily action, prayer for others, and service.
What Happens in First Step at The Magdalen House?
At the Men's House, First Step clients build their recovery on Steps One through Three. Ryan describes a weekend when sponsors filled the house — one working Step One at the dining table, another in the meeting room, another on the way to the garage. After one session, a man approached Ryan with his Big Book open, stunned to realize he was not in control. That realization is where recovery begins.
To reach Ryan, visit the Men's House at 2002 Moser Avenue in Dallas, email ryan@magdalenhouse.org, or find him leading 10 a.m. meetings later in the week. The meeting schedule is posted in the Maggie's Men's Facebook group.
All donations help provide free alcohol recovery programs and services to alcoholics and their families at absolutely no cost. Give at magdalenhouse.org/donate.
